Three steps forward, one giant step back.....

Why?

Why would this happen to me.

AGAIN

when I'm over you some little thing, some tiny little thing,

reminds me of you,

of memories.

Some little thing reminds me of you.

STUPID MEMORIES

Stupid love

stupid heartbreak

Stupid for remembering

Stupid for even having this

happen to me.

Can you get out of my head?

Just get out of my head

I wish today it will rain all day
maybe that will kinda make the pain go away
trying to forgive you for abandoning me
praying but I think I'm still an angel away
angel away, yeah strange in a way
maybe that is why I chase strangers away
they got their guns out aiming at me
but I become near when they aiming at me
me, me, me against them
me against enemies, me against friends
somehow they both seem to become one
A sea full of sharks and they all smell blood
they start coming and I start rising*

-Nicki Minaj

Let's Have A Toast*

And I always find, yeah, I always find somethin' wrong

You been puttin' up wit' my shit just way too long

I'm so gifted at findin' what I don't like the most

So I think it's time for us to have a toast

Let's have a toast for the douchebags,

Let's have a toast for the assholes,

Let's have a toast for the scumbags,

Every one of them that I know

Let's have a toast to the jerkoffs

That'll never take work off

Baby, I got a plan

Run away fast as you can

Broken Strings

"Oh, it tears me up

I tried to hold on but it hurts too much

I tried to forgive but it's not enough

To make it all okay

You can't play our broken strings

You can't feel anything

That your heart don't want to feel

I can't tell you something that ain't real

Oh, the truth hurts and lies worse

How can I give anymore

When I love you a little less than before?"

-James Morrison

"Theres really no such thing as what might have been. there's what happened and what will happen. You just have to realize that what might have been is imaginary, and it's this beautiful illusion of how it could have been if you had just don't this right or if he just liked you or if things had just lined up. But things don't line up, and boys don't like you and you mess up for a reason."- Taylor Swift

And I Won't Look Back...

It took some time but here it is. Whatever happened, happened. You moved on. So have I. I was waiting for you, but I found out just staying out in the cold will do nothing but get you sick. So I'm going inside, I don't know when I'll talk to you again

I don't know what life has in store for me. But I do know,

Being without has made me stronger. So when you said those heartbreaking words to me, I now realize just by leaving me you also left me to grow stronger throughout the process of everything. I don't know when I'll talk to you again, or see you again or even be with you again. But for me to move on I need to say only three things.

goodbye, and thank you.

I'm Breathing Again

This entire time all I needed was time. Time to realize, time to think, time to cry, time to regrett, time to lose hope, time to regain trust, time to breathe, time to heal, time to understand, time to listen, time to regain hope, and time to move on. And in that time, that is what I did.

I've moved on.

I'm no longer trying to fix something that needs to remain broken. I'm no longer blaming myself, no longer in denial , no longer feeling emptiness, no longer crying as often, I'm no longer caught up in you.